Silly Old Bear

It was Tuesday, May 17, 1994. The east Texas sun warmed the afternoon air as we buried my 91-year-old grandmother beside her husband in Laws Chapel Cemetery on the outskirts of Atlanta, Texas. Grandpa Horace had preceded her in death by more than 25 years. He had been a faithful gospel preacher during his time. Mama Grace was a diligent student of God’s word, and had taught numerous Bible classes throughout her lifetime. These were my Dad’s parents.

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Olympic Gold Medalist Nikki Stone has written a book promoting her unique philosophy of success, a philosophy which she calls “The Turtle Effect”. Nikki explains: “The Turtle Effect was taught to me by my mother when I was a young girl. She told me that I could achieve anything I wanted to as long as I remembered to have a soft inside, a hard shell, and be sure to stick my neck out.” [1] Nikki’s book is entitled Why Turtles Fly and is due out in January 2010. It can be pre-ordered through Amazon.com . 25% of the author’s net proceeds from the sale of this book will be donated to the American Cancer Society. [2]

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In 1998, Walt Disney Pictures released a movie called “Mighty Joe Young”. The movie was about a huge gorilla named Joe living in the jungles of Africa. Joe is brought to the United States to save him from being killed by poachers, and he eventually ends up back in Africa on a wildlife refuge created especially for him.

It was a pretty good movie. But the best thing about the movie was an enchanting lullaby that kept appearing in the soundtrack throughout the entire movie. The song is entitled “Windsong”, and it was written and sung in the Swahili language.

Listen to “Windsong”.

I was captivated by this incredibly beautiful, soul-stirring composition the first time I heard it. But not knowing Swahili, I had no idea what the song was saying. So I did some research.

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About four months after Ashley died, Susan and Justin and I took a trip from our home in Texas to visit some friends in Tennessee and then spend a few days in the Great Smoky Mountains. Driving late at night, somewhere between Memphis and Nashville, the idea for a song began growing in my head. It was a tribute to the remarkable life of my Ashley, her profound impact on our lives as her family, and the deep emptiness left in our hearts by her death. But even amidst the palpable sadness of our grief, I found my thoughts, and the emerging song, focusing on the hope that is inherent in my faith — the promise that, one day, we will see her and hold her once again.

The more we drove, the more the song grew and began to organize itself into verses and a chorus. I asked Susan to find some paper and a pen and start writing down the words so that I wouldn’t forget them. I drove and Susan wrote, and by the time we reached Nashville, “Until Then” was a song.

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It’s hard to believe it has been eight years: November 24, 2001. Sometimes it seems as though it was only yesterday that you left us, Ashley. Then there are moments when it seems that a lifetime has passed since that awful day.

I still miss you like crazy. We’re doing OK, though. You taught us to cherish every day. Most days we remember to do that. You taught us to live life to the fullest, to squeeze every drop of adventure out of every day that God gives us. You showed us that the real beauty of life is living with a complete trust in God. It’s funny how I’ve been a minister most of my adult life, but you figured that out so much better and lived it so much more completely than I ever have.

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A few months after my daughter Ashley died, I called a friend and asked him to meet me for lunch. Andy Moya is one of those creative types who seems to be good at everything he does. He is a graphics artist/designer by trade, and a very talented musician by avocation. I was captivated by his CD of Christmas favorites played on piano.

Andy is also just an all-around great guy. I came to know him through a mutual friend, and have always enjoyed any opportunity to visit with him. He is deeply spiritual and loves the Lord with all his heart. I have a great respect for him in that regard.

I invited Andy to lunch because I had a favor to ask of him. I wanted to have a beautiful instrumental song written especially in Ashley’s memory. Knowing Andy’s creativity, musicianship, and heart, I felt like he would be the perfect person for such an undertaking, if he was interested.

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[PART 11 OF 12]

As Solomon chronicles his quest for meaning and purpose in his life, he makes an interesting observation regarding sorrow and joy.

“It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of every man; the living should take this to heart. Sorrow is better than laughter, because a sad face is good for the heart. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of pleasure. It is better to heed a wise man’s rebuke than to listen to the song of fools. Like the crackling of thorns under the pot, so is the laughter of fools. This too is meaningless.”
(Ecclesiastes 7:2-6)

Huh? Sorrow is better than laughter? That doesn’t make sense! A sad face is good for the heart? Doesn’t that contradict Proverbs 17:22?

“A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”
(Proverbs 17:22, which, by the way, was also written by Solomon)

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Country singer Alan Jackson sang a song entitled “Where Were You (When The World Stopped Turning)?”, referring to that fateful day in 2001 that will forever be remembered simply as “Nine Eleven”.

Do you remember where you were?

I will never forget.

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Ashley wanted to be an actor. She was in Drama in junior high and really enjoyed it. When a letter arrived in the mail from a talent agency in Dallas, addressed to her, Ashley lit up. The agency had some spots open for new clients, and would be interviewing prospects in the near future. Ashley begged us to take her. So we did.

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Childhood Cancer Awareness Gold Ribbon

September is
Childhood Cancer Awareness Month .

My daughter Ashley died of cancer in November 2001. She was 14 years old. Diagnosed with a brain tumor when she was almost 10, she went through a year-and-a-half of treatments, was cancer-free for three years, and then relapsed in the Fall of 2001. She survived only two-and-a-half months after her relapse.

In the United States in 2007, more than 10,000 children under the age of 15 were diagnosed with cancer. Over 1,500 of them will die from the disease. Cancer is the second leading cause of death in children, exceeded only by accidents. (Source: American Cancer Society )

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